Mummy is going to kill us!

We're swinging from her new crystal lights!!

Weeeeeeeeee!

Dun ask us how we got up there!

Hi everyone,

Cousin aunty is not feeling well and mummy is rather traumatised. :(

Cousin aunty, i hope you get better soon... i promise to be a good lamb and not irritate you anymore on our road trips. :(

Hello everyone, my mummy is in a foul mood. Our new tel number came out first prize on sunday! Darn! We didnt buy!

*sob*

I could have a new playground built for me! =(

Dunnoe if this feng shui guy is good anot! Like this is more frustrating! :(((((((((

Yang Por Por is damn upset with us for not buying also!

Hello everyone!

Today's entry is dedicated to my friends from Port Dickson!!

Hello Austral, Hello Wati, Hello Swan! Its me, Gorry!

*waves madly*

I heard that you're frequent visitors to my blog! :)))

Yay! Hugs from Kambing Anak Anak!

Saya Tak Tawu, Saya kambing anak anak! Saya Tak Boleh Tahan BBW!

Hi everyone,

I hate my mummy.

She made me wear a bikini because she says that people will go to blogs with pple in bikinis in it. Like shitty desmond who is surfing blogs of a certain XXX cos she's wearing a bikini.

Hi Everyone! Look at my new toy that my best friend Grasse bought for me!

Lambrilla is soooo jealous! I shall run Dolphy over with it! =)

I love my new toy bus and i love grasse! She's the only one who still loves me! :(

Even Jill said that i was a disgusting dust ball yesterday. I went home and cried my eyes out! But not for long becos...Hey, i may be disgusting but i'm still cute!

Lookit wad i did to my pal dolphy! I think his mummy is going to kill me.

Dear everybody!

I've got a secret to tell all of you!!! Big Bad Wolf has a shirt of me!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

No, not a shirt by me if you thought i was referring to its material but he has a spiffy t shirt with a picture of a brown sheep!

He loves me afterall!!!

*sniff*

*sob*

All this while, i thought he hated me! I guess all that throwing me around,smacking, punching, kiap-ing, piak-ing was just a big show huh!

Anyway thats my favourite shirt of bbw! Its kinda tight though cos bbw is eating iron bars again and drinking cement powders. which is kinda scary cos it means the kiaping is gg to be dem painful.

Mummy's pathetic wine collection:

Okie, due to popular demand ( 1 person out of 1 person, meaning 100%) , here are more pictures, but the house is not ready yet so i guess the final picture would be much nicer!

My pride and joy: Swarovski chandelier over dining table

Hokkaido Glassware: From Otaru

Overview of the living and dining room

My Unfinished kitchen...

Hello peeps!

Here's a sneak preview of my new house@ Lorong K! :))))

There's even an ocean for me to swim in! Yang Por Por says its a bathtub, but then it looks like an ocean to me!

Mummy has been running here and there to buy stuff and do stuff while i am snoring away @ Por Por's house. hee hee. I need to find a new mummy if she suddenly drops dead from all the exhaustion though...

Its not finished yet , akan datang! ( Now where did i learn to speak Malay? )

Hi friends, singaporean and countrymen, this is ur weekly Gorrillamb Super star celebrity update:

WE've been filming Mission Impossible 3 all the time and for some reason, he keeps forgetting the camera! I have to keep repeating the stunts! I hate him very very very much! *sob*



I've been kiaped again on my face and it hurts! Oh, he conveniently forgot the camera and told me that we have to repeat the scene again. It hurts!

I was flung against the ferry window also, luckily for me it was not opened. Or was it lucky? I dunnoe. Maybe i will be the next gongfu star after Jackie Chan.

Meano beano BBW.

Hi everyone!

Look at this person! She's my creator!

I feel so sad because my creator is starting to be mean also! She said that she wanted to buy the kiwi back for my mummy but then the kiwi refused. And then this little lamb that she was distracted by, was soooooo cute that she decided to buy a little lamb for my mummy.

I dont understand what the above means because i thought that i was my mummy's real flesh and blood? Whats this about buying me? I dont understand!

Anyway the little lamb looks like Lambrilla! And she looks like she's running away! hee hee.

Mummy, me, lambrilla, shitty desmond, yaling, Janice and William attended a XXX election party on friday night!!! Here i am! Its dark becos, well, its dark. Anyway also becos mummy is scared that we'd all be hauled up into jail so she took a dark foto so that noone could identify us. Anyway i have to tell u what funny sms that shitty desmond sent to mummy and me and yang por por laughed her ass off!

We were supposed to meet up and Shitty Desmond wrote to us: " We'll meet you at the right of the bright lights."

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHHAHAHAH!!!! Thats sooooo duh! POS's thinking must have rubbed off him!

Hi everyone,

Today Albert came down to MCR and tried to make Mr Loh box me up in the LRCCU reactor. He's mean!

I feel so sorry for myself :(

Hi peeps,

I realised i never wrote anything or told u guys about my "creator". My creator brought me back from NZ and to my mummy.

I dun understand my "creator", sometimes she's nice to me and sometimes she's not. But i think she dislikes my mummy a whole lot more than me.

Anyway she just threatened to take me away from my mummy cos of lambrilla. She says that i was meant to be an only child only, (yay! finally someone understands me!)

Anyway creator says that she was going to apologise to the world for bringing me to my mummy. I wonder why. Doesnt everyone love me? :(

Hello Everyone!

Today is picture time! As you know, a picture tells a thousand words!

This is proof that i bathed! So there! I dun like to bath very much but every once in a while when mummy starts breaking out, she will haul my ass up to the sink. Anyway she doesnt ever stop to think whether its the copious amounts of coffee she drinks, her terrible diet of junk food or simply the stress at work, Oh no, it ALWAYS MY fault. I'm the dirty little thing causing her outbreak. :'(

But thats ok, i luff luff luff my mummy. :)

This picture is taken by shitty desmond while he was off in NZ drinking himself silly. Anyway this was taken at the airport and he sent this 3 times via his company phone and we hope to report him to his bosses. Anyway i dont recognise them but everyone says the above are my siblings or friends etc etc. But seriously, i dun give a git abt them nor can i remember who the heck they are.

Lambrilla and me had a big fight. I think she's a nai niang stealer. :(((((

The above shows that good and evil can co-exist together!!!! I managed to get away only with a broken leg after taking this foto. :(

But its ok, i shall persevere!!! The big bad wolf will not truimph!!!! bah!!!

Hello everyone, i'm a sad sad lamb.

Look, i've got a sister. hardy ha ha. Whoopee. Oh Joy.

Courtesy of that shitty desmond who brought her back from NZ. Her name is Lambrilla Tan Li Yang. And everyone now is more interested in her than me.

My Nai Niang doesnt want me anymore and fine, i dun wan her either. Ptui!

Here we are, all tucked up in bed and waiting for mummy to tell us bed time stories. I think my mummy thinks she's Angelina Jolie adopting kids from all over.

Its a sad sad day.

Dear all,

The happiest thing in my life just happened. GRWACE BOT ME A HAPPY MEAL!!!!!!!!

I'm sooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo happy! For once, my mummy actually let me eat it. It was exactly how i imagined it to be. Delish!

I was going to run PIMs for the whole of humanity but on account of my NBF (New Best Friend) Grwace, i shall not.

*rubbing tummy* yummmmmmmmmmmmmy!

Hey hey!

I promised that i would write this next story for this fren of mine... Here goes:

Once upon a time, there was this little lamb who was loved and adored by all and sundry blah blah blah, anyway, he had this fren called Gu-Ah. (*pounds little hands on table and stamps feet on ground in laughter*)

Gu-Ah and little lamb were good friends, though Lillian Too says that sheep and cows were not supposed to be friends cos we're at opposite ends of this circle that the very first rat, cow, tiger, rabbit, dragon, snake, horse, sheep, monkey, chicken, dog and pig ran in some race. Dont ask me what they were running from and where to or whether the cow tripped the sheep and thats why they are mortal enemies.

Anyway it started from there and carried on down to the poor children of the above mentioned. Hence Gu-Ah and the little lamb battled it out on a daily basis. With the poor little lamb suffering injustice all the time. :(

Anyway here's a mantra for all my fans:

Eat a beaver
Save a tree
Eat a cow and
Save some sheep

Hello everybody.

This is a strong message against terrorism.

I was impounded, incarcerated, captured and walloped by the bbw yesterday for the immediate removal of his picture from the earlier blog entry.

My mummy and me WILL NOT BOW DOWN IN THE FACE OF TERRORISM. ( and the following is it)

Anyway in addition to being held against my own will, i was dangled upside down and made to do yoga against my own wishes. It hurts. :*(

He proceeded to bash me up with a limeade can and technically he did abuse the can cos he bashed the can with my face.

The daring sheep mummy made a brave and successful rescue attempt, securing my release. I immediately curled up in a corner in the bag and cried my eyes out. Albeit for a while. I am now making my counter strike against terrorism.

Everybody, pls mail me to give me ideas on how to handle the big bad wolf.

STOP TERRORISM!

Hello Everybody!

Its me again! Anyway who else can it be other than me??? :)

Anyway today i did something mean to Nai Niang's dolphin. I kind of u noe, stuffed him into nai niang's glass. And covered it up. Luckily it was a glass and nai niang could see him. (after some time) Anyway she was not amused. Ah well. She's got no sense of humour. (like some wolves i know.)

Anyway Grwace has promised to buy me a happy meal soon. ;)

I promise to put in some new fotos of me soon :)

Hi everyone,

Poor me.

I dunnoe why the bbw (big bad wolf) hates me. He couldnt believe that i took a bath and proceeded to kidnap me and dangle me by my toes.

I think he hates me cos i'm cute and fuzzy and brown.

Everyone loves sheep. :)

Why, big bad wolf? WHY DO YOU HATE ME!?

By the way big bad wolf just said its cos i look delicious. Fishy birdie.

U know what?! I HATE U TOO! So there!

Hello Everybody!

Its me! Superstar Gorry! I'm on page 28 of FHM!!! I'm a celebrity! I'm famous! I'm glamorous! I'm.... I'm... A SUPERSTAR!!!!!!!!!

Anyway remember Boo Boo? Its not fair, Boo boo gets to sleep all day at home on the bed but i have to come to work.

I HATE THE BIG BAD WOLF! I HATE HIM VERY VERY MUCH!!!! In my first 3 days in MCR, i have been abducted a couple of times, almost drowned, my face kiap-ed and today he cut my hair off!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I HATE HIM! I HATE HIM VERY VERY MUCH!

*SOB*

But i am a brave little lamb. Here's my new song:

I Will Survive Lyrics
by Gorry Gaynor

First I was afraid
I was petrified
Kept thinking I could never live
with you by my side
But I spent so many nights
thinking how you did me wrong
I grew strong
I learned how to carry on
and so you're back
from outer space

I just walked in to find you here
with that meano look upon your face
I should have changed my stupid lock
I should have made you leave your key
If I had known for just one second
you'd be back to bother me
Go on now go walk out the door
just turn around now
'cause you're not welcome anymore
weren't you the one who tried to hurt me with a pair of scissors
you think I'd crumble
you think I'd lay down and die
Oh no, not I
I will survive
as long as i know how to mehh

I know I will stay alive
I've got all my life to live
I've got all my mehhh to give
and I'll survive
I will survive

It took all the strength I had
not to fall apart
kept trying hard to mend
the pieces of my broken head
and I spent oh so many nights
just feeling sorry for myself
I used to cry
Now I hold my head up high
and you see me
somebody new
I'm not that chained up little lamb
still angry with you
and so you felt like dropping in
and just expect me to be weak
now I'm saving all my mehhhing
for someone who's loving me

Hi Peeps!!

We're moving office to MCR with Nai Niang and the Big Bad Wolf.

I'm quite worried though . But mummy has been making me floats and a collection of swimming trunks and the last resort is a ziplock bag. :)

I hope that the big bad wolf doesnt bite me or drown me too much. I'm a sensitive little thing.

Hello Everyone!!!

This is Boo Boo and me! He's a monkey! I'm quite jealous of him, he has a spiffy tail and a spiffy swing! :(

I want a tail. *Sulk*

My Nai Niang and Grwace have been telling me that i will grow one soon. But it doesnt look like its happening.

I want a swing. *stomp*

I've taken to attempting to swing on my mummy's bag but i kept falling off and people kept beating me up everytime i fall off.

Its me and Mashi Moron! At his dad's place playing mahjong. His dad lost big time.

This is Boo boo!!!

Konnichiwa!!!! Watashi wa geisha desu ne!!! Ii yo?? Kawaii desu ka? Yokata!!

Hello everyone, in case you guys dun recognise me, its me!! No, i didnt turn into a girl. My mummy just decided to dress me up as a geisha for the fun of it! :) And soooo befitting this blog 'cos its memoirs of a lamb.


Here i am attending a course with my mummy and Nai Niang. Dolph was supposed to be here on this course with me too but Nai Niang lied to me. :(

Anyway it was sooooo boring that i had more fun watching paint dry.

And Nai Niang and mummy made me sit on a scratchy bowl of sweets. I heard they had a yummylicious lunch of chicken chop!

These are my new friends at Desmond's house. I'm king of the world!!!

Hi Guys,

Guess what? King Wong was spotted in the Main office today after attempting to bash me up. But i huffed and i puffed and i blew her away. Here's proof;



Anyway Grwace has brought a meano cushion head that is trying to chew me up. Here i am attempting to call my nai niang for help and she totally ignored me. :(

Happy New Year to everyone!!! ITs me!!! I got new clothes!

Anyway the year of the Fire Dog is not a very happy one for me so far because my por por gave me an ang bao of choc coins and my mummy ate them all up. :~(
I hope she grows fat and gets lots of pimples.

We went to stupid Desmond's place yesterday to play mahjong and ban luck and he was wearing his stupid gross red underwear from Taiwan, which did not bring him much luck anyway. :)
They had the words " Bao yin" (Sure win) in chinese on his ass.

And he pushed me off the table just because he was losing at Ban Luck. I hope he grows pimples in the words "Bao Yin". 1 on each cheek. :)

Here i am! Cutie Pie gorry!

Check out me and my friends from GSE!!!

Yoo hoo!! I'm a little mousey today!!

Okie i am back. Dolph's mummy didnt like my post. Who cares.



Anyway here i am sitting in my mummy' s car and i have to put this foto up because she almost got into an accident while taking this foto.



And here i am with Dolph. Donnoe why i am looking unusually scruffy.

This is a tribute to my friend, Dolphin.

Who's not really a dolphin but thats another story. Anyway Dolphin has gone to a far away place called MCR along with his mummy and there are plenty of other fishes there. The big bad wolf also lurkes around there so its quite a scary place.

Anyway Dolphin and me had lots and lots of fun while he was in the MO and i kind of miss him. We'd get into lots of trouble and Dolphin would ALWAYS blame me. And i end up getting blamed for all kinds of things that is not really my fault. But that's ok, Dolp's my friend. I guess that's what friends are for.

Anyway here's a typical day in the life of me and Dolp at the Main office. :)










This is me when i woke up and then i went to office and i found dolph's bad mummy left him out to be a salted fish. That is, she forgot to put him in water. So being the heroic and brave little lamb that i am, i put him in the next available liquid that i could find. Unfortunately, my mummy's coffee.

And then unfortunately he didnt make it so i decided to make sashimi for my mummy. And here i am, saving dolph from a series of traffic accidents. I am using my super lamb strength to wedge him out from the trailer. :( Poor dolph.

Anyway, pls note that no animals were harmed in the making of the "Tribute to Dolphin."

I'm sooooooo sad. My Nai Niang has gone away to a far far away place in MCR. I cant visit her because i am scared of the big bad wolf of MCR. :'(

SO many changes, everyone has gone away. And since nai niang has gone away, i need a new nai niang but Grace doesnt want to be my new nai niang. She says she can only be a pal, not a nai niang. But i want a new nai niang. *stomp feet*

Anyway Mighty Mikey came in today and while my yang ma ma was not around, he gave me a spanking. *wail*

But guess what i got a new coffee pot!!! Here it is!

Anyway, i turned off the sound on my mummy's alarm clock today and she woke up late. :(

And she wants to kill me now.

*snicker*

Hello Everybody!

Today's story is about King Wong. (The following is based on a true story)

There once lived a cruel, mean and nasty beastly beast called King Wong who enjoyed lumbering around and bashing up little lambs.

King Wong was green, hairy, smelt of pickles and enjoyed dressing up like a clown. King Wong chased our favourite lamb hero over river and over dale, over the mountains and over the lakes. King Wong just couldnt stand that our favourite lamby hero was so cute and cuddly and everyone loved him.

Finally King Wong was so exhausted from chasing our lamby friend that it sat down to rest for a while. And the lamb dropped a stone on its head and killed King Wong. Here's King Wong now:

This is a story about Cindere-Ler.

Once upon a time, there was a girl called Cindere-Ler. She was mean and got meaner by the day by beating up little lambs. She sulked and she pouted if the little lambs did not listen to her. All the boy lambs and girl lambs feared her and wished that she would disappear in a puff of smoke.

One day, there appeared a brave little boy lamb called gor... i mean Theodore. (Phew, almost made an obvious reference to our favourite all time hero lamb)

Anyway Theodore stood bravely up to Cindere-Ler when she huffed and puffed and almost blew his house down in order to beat him up. Theodore ran rings around Cindere-Ler and got her so confused that she huffed and puffed and holy guacamole! she self combusted!!!!

And all the little lambs came out to play. The end.

Of course this is a story about me, what do think it was? About Adel and her cat cracking saga in Ular?

I'm in a terrible mood. I just found out that not only am i not an only child, i 'm a middle child!!!! What the *#&$(&^#@&*!

Yang por por and Yang gong gong brought back my elder brother. (Or so he claims)

Why why why why do all these things happen to me????? WHY!?!?!??! WHY!!?!?!

*sob*

And then there's Brownie.

*stamps feets*

But i guess its ok, the 3 of us can plot to murder mummy.

Everyone forgot my birthday. :'(

Everyone is a meano. :((

Decided to celebrate my birthday by my lonesome.

I'm back!

I've been getting rave reviews about my blog! Anyway today i decided to write about... Why lambs do not have any tails.

I mean in the first place, why would i need to have a tail? I wouldnt be able to sit down properly without looking like a cat or a dog would i?

To scratch myself or to chase away flies? I have my little paddy paws to do that. Anyway i'm too clean to do stuff like that right? My mummy just bathed me in Body Shop's Ginger Bath Shower Foam. ( I noticed that yang ma ma has been bathing me in suspicious and questionable flavours of bath foams, like Aveda's Rosemary and Thyme Shampoo. And i always smell like a dish. Why does the above sound strangely morbid?)

Anyway here's proof i havent got a tail.

And if u dun like it, you can kiss it.